Weak Seams, Wide Load

Okay, this story is embarrassing, but I'm still laughing about it, so I might as well share.

I left work and went to the used book store this afternoon in search of a book. After an hour of searching, I didn't find the one I was looking for, but one on the same subject.

Anyway, I left the store and as I was getting in the car, I felt my pants rip. I mean seriously ripped. Suddenly there was a lot more breathing room in my pants.

I started laughing almost hysterically about it. Especially when I started thinking about all the times I had squatted down in the store to look at books on the lower shelves. And believe me, I did that quite a bit as I scanned for the book I was looking for. This could have been so much more embarrassing! I had to text Becci to tell her what had happened.

At least it happened as I was leaving and getting in my car because I had absolutely nothing to cover my keister with. And it's a good thing I wore boy shorts today! LOL!!

So my next problem was to get from my car into the house. I pulled into the driveway and started scanning for neighbors. Whew! No one around.

I got out of the car, but there was no way to hide the giant rip. I tried to hold my purse behind me along with the books I'd bought. Then I looked down and saw my bra was completely showing. What the hell!? My shirt was coming unbuttoned! Somehow the buttons had come undone! If this keeps up I'll be naked before I reach the house!

Why is it that when you try to hurry the most, more things go wrong? As I was trying to unlock the door, and keep my rear and my chest hidden from view, I dropped the keys. Dammit! Hurry up and get them before someone drives by. I bent over to snag the keys and felt the split open even wider. Full moon over here!

I cracked up as soon as I set foot in the house. It was hilarious enough to me that I decided to even share the following embarrassing picture.

Note, objects in picture are as big as they seem. I'm putting down the laptop and getting back on the elliptical. And probably not eating for a week. Especially now that I've had not one but two Subway commercial moments.